Tension.

Steady eyes, heavy breaths,
Long goodbyes, sleepless rests.
Stealing glances, seconds past,
Increasing passion,
My last breath: a gasp.

Revelation

I found myself
Losing myself
In you again.
I loathed the way that
I loved the way
You were my beginning
And my end.

I fell in love with you in fall.

To say I fell, is not correct.
There’s an unintentional, accidental sense to falling.
I flew.
I took steps backwards, before I leapt
Down the void of the bottomless pit.
Like a leaf,
Breaking free from what made it.
What gave existence, meaningless,
Unstirring,
Existence.
To exist like so,
Is to cease to exist at all.
And when I freed myself,
After a season of transformation,
I twirled, I danced,
I flew.
I leapt.
I jumped.
I stumbled.
I fell.
To death.
I left what made me,
I ceased to exist
I lied, limp along with the others.
“I love the sound of leaves crunching under my feet.”

I fell in love with you in Fall.

Left, Right.

Red,
Your lips, the blush on my cheeks,
My lungs, oxygenated with every whisper that leaves
From those lips.
My heart, filled with love,
Beating furiously,
With every touch,
You linger, everywhere,
Every cell, every molecule, right
With you.

Blue,
My lips, the veins in my wrist,
My lungs, intoxicated by the departing words
From your parted lips
My heart, drained of blood,
Pumping weakly,
I can still feel your touch,
You linger, everywhere,
Every cell, every molecule, left
With you.

https://soundcloud.com/worcs-sax-ensemble/wse-4et-love-song

Tick Tock.

Sometimes, I like to look at the minutes of the clock and let them decide my fate.

I would look at the minutes, and depending on whether the number is odd or even, 

it would answer the lingering questions about my future that I ponder about late at night.

The very thoughts that keep me up at 4 a.m., tossing and turning while I explore every 'what if'.

"Will I do well on the exam tomorrow that I studied all night for?"

"Will I be able to find a good job after I've graduated?"

"Should I get a coffee before heading to class tomorrow?"

I would then look at the clock, and the even minutes would answer with a no, the odd, with yes.

The system is easy, and I've realized that the minutes on the clock never lie.

When I asked about passing an exam, I was confronted with an odd number, and surprisingly enough, I did pass.

When I asked about getting coffee before going to class, I was confronted with an even, which in turn saved me from being late from an important class - which I only arrived to on time.

The minutes on the clock never lie. 

Even when I ask the simplest questions, they are able to answer with odd or even correctly.

Am I a girl, odd.

Am I on wordpress, odd.

Is my name Sam, even. 

The minutes on the clock never lie.

Every night when I am accompanied by an unwanted friend, insomnia, I find myself asking the question I've asked countless times.

"Will he and I be forever?"

The minutes of the clock never lie.

Which is why, every time I ask that question, I close my eyes and turn away from the clock.

The minutes of the clock never lie.

Am I too afraid to know the truth? Odd.